Writer: Amr Khattab
Editor: Khaled Mohammed
I loved you from the bottom of my heart.
I hate that I will be calling you an Ex.
Ex is a really short word compared to the story.
I believed in love after I’d been broken.
You were the medicine of my broken heart.
You were my home. After each hard fucking day, I came back to you.
Spending all night with you was the best.
Singing with you all day, We were Blessed.
Dancing with you every night, I was pulling you into my chest.
It wasn’t an easy relationship. Because it’s not a relationship, it was two people who couldn’t live without each other. However, they did.
In relationships, whether it’s healthily or ended badly, you win. You either win a person who will be your second half, or you will learn a lesson. Unfortunately, life isn’t like school. Because life gives you really hard experiences and you end up actually learning. Unfortunately, what I have learned firsthand is that you shouldn’t expect anything from anyone. But I didn’t expect anything from you. However, I became such a devil. A devil who can’t trust anyone. It’s like Lucifer asked me what’s my desire.
Not to follow my heart, not to trust anyone easily, not to make stupid mistakes, to live alone strong, to live without needing anyone in my life, I answered. The devil told me that I have to kill my heart. Do you think I was hesitating? I just killed it to forget everything. The devil is controlling me. I am an angel with everyone, but a devil with myself. Scars of the devil distorted my hands, but it’s way better than distorting my innocent heart.
I’m starting to believe that I am good the way I am. Having scars doesn’t mean that I am a bad person. You are good the way you are. Let the devil kill your heart so you don’t get hurt easily, and be good with everyone like an angel, but don’t get attached to someone so you can be lonely.