Writer: Nesrina Ahmed
“You can never do anything right!”
“You can’t wear this dress. What will people say?!”
“Do you have to go out?”
I bet all of us have heard those lines before, and I’m guessing we all know who say them. Parents.
Living with strict parents is difficult. You’re not allowed to fully enjoy the simplest things, such as going out with friends, or even on your own. This strictness irritates their child, and from his/her point of view, they are controlling his life and restricting his freedom. On the contrary, the parents think they’re protecting their children from the outside world. In their opinion, their strictness is the only way to control and raise a child.
When we looked deeper into this problem, we determined that there are numerous types of strict parents with differing cases.
The 1st type, the parents who do not allow their child to go out in a fear of the outside world. We call these types of parents “Prison Guards”. Furthermore, no matter how old their child is, they still think they’re irresponsible and must always be watched over.
The 2nd type are the parents who are never satisfied with anything their child does and always expect them to be perfect at everything, stressing their child out and adding more weight onto their shoulders until they break down. We call these types of parents “Critics”.
The 3rd type, parents who try to achieve their unachieved dreams through their child. They force him to play some kind of sport, learn some kind of instrument, or study a specific subject just because they wanted to do so when they were younger, but couldn’t. We call these types of parents “Fantasists”.
There are other types of strict parents, but those are the major three that we usually find.
Strict parents can affect their child mentally in different ways. “Prison Guard” parenting cements the idea in a child’s head that the outside world is dangerous, preventing him/her from communicating with other people normally and overall making them an anxious and cowardly person.
“Critic” parents build insecurities in the child’s head, so that no matter how hard he tries, “I’m never good enough. I never do anything correctly” is always echoing at the back of his mind. This holds him back from appreciating himself and eventually, he may just give up.
“Fantasist” parents take away a child’s individuality. As they keep achieving their parents’ dreams and ambitions, they slowly forget their own ambitions and purpose in life.
Strict parents misunderstand parenting, and instead of raising a child that is “perfect”, they raise a child with an endless amount of mental issues. There’s one solution for this parenting disaster; the child needs to sit down with their parents and discuss their problems and how their strict behavior affects them. Hopefully, the parents’ attitude towards their kid changes, and they live happily ever after. But sadly, that’s not what happens with most of these cases, Usually, the parents refuse to admit any fault in their parenting and the child ends up having to deal with his/her mental issues down the road.