Venom of Frames

Writer: Fayrouz Elbarakawy

Poetry had been always the only way I could narrate my feelings,in an artistic and passive way . Venom of Frames is a situation I had with my own parents. I felt like I couldn’t talk about it. I felt heavy and silenced. I finally decided that maybe narrating it would make it less hard for me to deal with what I have been keeping in, for decades perhaps.

My goal as I sat,

On the cold, rigid floor

Is more than becalled

Success, or so far I know

Late midnights,

Flipping of pages and lines,

Till it is past the sleep time,

On the hope, I would see

Your smile, while I almost died

Been losing so much of myself,

But my intention, is that happiness

I am always willing to sketch

And you would say I made it, with frankness

On the other while, you did not take my hand

You left me, floating in my owy black

Years and ages, wishing I finish the plan

“Don’t you see who got this?

Don’t you see no one failed as you did?”

Little did you know, they all had bargains

And I was not raised to be within the cheats

But a fearless leader,

Not someone with a sick-mind

You always said to be believe in faith

You keep asking for so much,

And I become “the not enough”

Even my siblings would stand up

And call me names, just as you did

Once or every single day

Chasing grades till they become,

On repeat nightmares, and I can’t escape

The only way to fly by, is never chase a lie

As I was told, since I opened my eyes

And you did not think about it,

Neither a split of seconds, nor time

You keep putting those frames,

Of someone you wish you had made

But please, realize

I am not a picture to paint

Sinceres, my flaws and your worst case